About 400 people attended funeral services for Karmjit Dhillon Monday (Feb. 9) - but one of the people who most needed to be there was a continent away.
Because the Canadian Embassy would not grant a special emergency visa for Sukhdeep Dhillon to come to Canada by the morning of the funeral, she was unable to attend the funeral of her late husband, one of seven Squamish residents who lost their lives in a head-on collision on Hwy. 99 Jan. 31.
The couple had only been married for three months.
The decision has caused even more distress and sorrow to the Sikh community in Squamish, which had been prepared to delay the funeral if Dhillon's visa was approved by the morning of the funeral.
"All of the efforts were made - but nothing," said Makhan Sanghera, President of the Squamish Sikh Society. "We thought we would have the support of the government. It's quite disappointing and very sad that she will not be able to come here to mourn for her husband."
"It's really hard to explain," Sanghera continued. "What can we say. We're not blaming anyone but we all wish she was here - we're all very sad by this news."
Maryanne Wezenbeek, general manager of the Delta Whistler Resort, where Dhillon was employed, was present at the service and spoke highly of Dhillon to the hundreds of seated mourners.
"When he came to us he was very polite but quite shy - until his sense of humour came out. When he smiled his whole face would light up. He was very proud of his culture and spoke often of life with his new wife," she said.
"The memory of the quiet young man with the beautiful smile will live with us - may he rest in peace."
After the emotional ceremony, an air of disappointment with the government decision spread through the funeral chapel.
"We tried everything but they couldn't help us,' said Avtar Gidda, Secretary of the Squamish Sikh Society. "We feel it was a stone-hearted and cold-minded decision. Quite inhuman that they could not see how a young widow needs to be here. We just wanted her to come temporarily to say a last farewell to her husband - it's really too bad. This young man came to Canada to start a new life. He himself was full of life and now we are full of sorrow."
Moments after the funeral, the Chief learned that the Canadian government had indeed issued a visa to Sukhdeep Dhillon. Thanks to the efforts of John Reynolds, MP for West Vancouver-Sunshine Coast who personally wrote letters on behalf of Mrs. Dhillon, the government changed its stance and issued the visa.
Reynolds criticized the government for its apparent disinterest in the matter until he had to intervene personally, bringing the matter to the attention of the appropriate minister.
"The government at first denied Sukhdeep Dhillon permission to come to Canada to grieve at the funeral of her husband of three months," said Reynolds. "But it was only after I and my colleague Gurmant Grewal each wrote letters guaranteeing that the young widow would return to India that Ottawa began to listen."
He said that just minutes before he was due to make a public condemnation of the Liberals for their heartlessness, he was informed by the Minister's office that compassionate Ministerial permits would be granted so Mrs. Dhillon could fly to Canada for the funeral.
Unfortunately, the news came a day too late.
"We couldn't wait any longer," said Gidda. "The funeral is now over so now what can we do?"
Gidda said that Sukhdeep Dhillon had returned to the immigration office in Punjab three times, and each time she was refused permission to enter Canada. At press time, Gidda was unsure whether or not she would come to Canada to grieve with the parents and sister of her husband, who live in Squamish.
"I don't know how she will handle this kind of situation. The funeral is over. What will she do, come here and cry? Why does the government have to make it so hard in this situation?"
If she does decide to come, she can be sure that she will be well looked-after in Squamish.
"Help is always there if she comes," said Gidda. "We will do anything for her."
Several services have been held or will be held this weekend to commemorate the lives of the seven Squamish residents who died in the accident. A public service for the five Indo-Canadians killed in the crash was held Saturday (Feb. 7), while friends and family of Ian and Alexander Barbour gathered at Totem Hall last Friday (Feb. 6).
Funeral services for Balwinder Gill are scheduled for Saturday, Feb. 14 at 11 a.m. Jasdeep Sandhu's funeral will be held on Sunday, Feb. 15 at 11 a.m. Both services will be held at the Squamish Funeral Chapel in the Garibaldi Highlands.
In Whistler, friends and family embraced each other as tears were wiped away at a memorial at the Telus Conference Centre on Wednesday (Feb. 11) for those who died in the accident.
The sense of community at the service attended by more than 300 people was overwhelming as hands were held, shoulders embraced and inspirational words shared.
"It has been a very tough 11 days for everyone in Squamish, the Sea to Sky and families of the people who were killed," said Squamish Mayor Ian Sutherland. "The entire community is still in shock."
The five Sikh men worked at various hotels in Whistler and were carpooling home after working the night shift. The Barbours were in a northbound vehicle, going to pick up Ian Barbour's girlfriend in Brackendale before heading to a hockey tournament in Sechelt.
"The loss of seven lives has been a huge blow," friend and Squamish resident Paul Lalli said. "Squamish doesn't see that many deaths in a year, let alone one day."
"There are no words to express the grief and sense of loss felt by so many in the Sea to Sky corridor today," Whistler Mayor Hugh O'Reilly said. "As closely interrelated communities, we support and help each other in good times and bad."
Sikh Temple secretary Avtar Gidda spoke about how the show of support from the various communities has been a great comfort to the families during their hardest days.
"Today we say thanks from the families and the Sikh society and friends," Gidda said. "Everyone has given us all the help, hope and strength we need. Thank you for sharing your grief, heart and kindness pouring out from your hearts."
Gidda said a special, three-day prayer vigil is planned at the temple, where the men can be remembered and prayers said to help the grieving families find strength and comfort.
Some hotels where the men had worked have set up grief counselling for those affected. One of the managers was surprised by the broad cross section of employees who took part in the service. Lalli said the number of people seeking counselling shows how much the deaths have affected the entire community.
"A community is all about helping each other in a time of need," Lalli said, thanking the numerous individuals and businesses that have supported the families.
"We've lost those lives, but we most not forget them."
- with files from Nicole Fitzgerald, Whistler Question
